Memorable Moments (pt. 7)

Oct. 17

Around 12:30, Tuco was calling my name. I went outside to see what he wanted. Usually, he's with his siblings when he's calling me, but today, he was alone. I asked him what he wanted, and he said that he wanted to play cars with me, but he didn't have his cars. I asked him where they were, and he said that they were in his house. I laughed, thinking he was going to say he lost them or something, but no. I told him to get them so we could play. As he came with the cars, Gabi and Ximena, one of his baby sisters, followed him. We went to the front of the church, where there is smooth cement, to play. I then realized that I needed to call back my good friend, Jon, whom I called before, but he said to call him back. I called him, and I told him that Tuco was with me. Jon wanted to talk to him, so I let him. It was funny yet cool to watch Tuco talk to my friend, Jon, because, at first, Tuco would shake or nod his head instead of saying yes or no as if Jon were right there. I then told Tuco that he needed to say something, so he started talking. Gabi wanted to talk to Jon, too, but Tuco was, so I said to wait until he was done. She got mad and told her mom something to make Tuco come home. That made me upset. I finally got the chance to play with Tuco, and Gabi had to ruin it. I pray I get the chance to play with him again, like him asking me and not vise versa.

After the kids got home from school, I went to see what they were up to since I wasn't doing anything. I saw older Carlos and went with him to the store. Afterward, we went to his house and talked. Claudia was there, too. Older Carlos randomly asked me if I was going to Michigan. I was about to ask him who said that, but then Carlos came over and said that I was. Older Carlos and Claudia looked at me to see what I had to say. I looked at Carlos and said, "Sí, pero ¿que yo dije?" At that, Carlos said oops and covered his mouth. I told him not to tell anyone, and here he was telling other kids, which I was going to wait to tell them until Saturday. Older Carlos looked sad, but Claudia was happy. Literally. I'm not sure if she was like that to cover up her feelings, or if she genuinely was happy that I was leaving. A little later, Tuco came over, and Claudia told him that I was leaving. That made me mad. He looked at me, I confirmed what she said, and he walked into his yard with a sad look on his face and sat behind the wooden fence so that I couldn't see him. I legit almost cried. I especially wanted to wait to tell him because I knew he would be sad, and he was. Thankfully, I was able to get him to come back out so I could explain things to him. Gabi and Mona came over and heard, too. I was able to tell them that if I go back, I can get help from my church and come back and stay for a really long time. I told them that I wanted to take them all with me, but couldn't. They all got really excited and started acting crazy, haha. I really do want to take Carlos and Tuco with me, but, of course, I can't. They don't have the papers to cross the border. Haha, no, of course I can't take someone else's kids. That would be kidnapping. Unless I got permission.......

I told the worship team that I was leaving. They said that we need to take pictures on Sunday before I leave. That was my plan, haha.

I talked with Luis today, and he's going to help me talk to the girl I like tomorrow. I really want to talk with her before I leave, so, hopefully, I can talk to her at least every day until I leave. I've barely been able to talk to her.

Caesar has been gone for the past three weeks, and he finally came back today. His dad was sick, so Caesar stayed over in Tecate until his dad got better. Apparently, his dad is better now. Praise the Lord.

Oct. 18

I hung out with Luis a lot today. He came over around 10, and I was about to have a time of worship, so he joined me. He came over because I was going to have him help me talk to the girl I like, but when we went to her house, she couldn't talk because her dad was home. Her dad is apparently really jealous of his daughters. Anyway, so she said that she might come to the church later with her sister because I was teaching her English, which I wasn't aware of because her sister said nothing about it to me. So, Luis and I left and went to the church. He asked me what I was going to say to her, and I said I just really wanted to get to know her. While we were talking about it, I got a weird feeling about talking to her. Not like nervousness, but something else, like in my heart. I thought that maybe God was telling me that I shouldn't talk to her, but I wasn't sure. Maybe it was just nervousness, and I was over thinking everything. Maybe not. After Luis left, I prayed that if it was truly meant for me to talk with her that she would come to the church today. If God didn't want me to talk to her, then I prayed that she wouldn't show up.
She didn't. Neither did her sister/. I thought maybe it was because I usually teach English on Fridays and not Thursdays, but I don't know. If it was meant to happen, she would've came to the church anyway, right? I don't know. Pray for me.

I did part of the Bible study tonight. I had to read a certain chapter in Proverbs, pick a verse or a few, and explain what I thought it meant. I read Proverbs 4:7-9. It talks about how important it is to get the wisdom of God before anything else, and we will be exalted and honored. I explained what I felt these verses meant to me, and I feel that I did an ok job. If I knew Spanish a little bit more, things would have flowed a lot smoother, but it's all good. I said what I felt God wanted me to say, and that was that.
I also told everyone at célula, what they call the mini-church service in people's houses, that I was leaving to Michigan. I explained what happened and asked them to pray for me. I forgot to mention that I was leaving this Sunday, though. Oops. Hopefully, I can tell them before Sunday.
We also had arroz con leche and geletina uva, which is rice pudding and grape jello, after célula. So delicious. I was actually hoping we would have jello, and we did. The arroz con leche was definitely a bonus.

After dinner (it was like Mac and cheese, but with spaghetti. Strangely delicious), I played tazos with Carlos. I was tired, so I laid (not sure if this is grammatically correct, but oh well) on the floor. Carlos asked me if I wanted to play the durmiendo juego. In English, the sleeping game.
One day, I was outside playing with the kids. I got really tired, so I laid down on the ground and said, "Yo quiero jugar durmiendo juego. ¡Es mi favorito!" Of course, I was joking about it being a game, but now, every time Carlos and I lay under the stars, he calls it the durmiendo juego. Love it.
Anyway, of course, I agreed. As we lay there, he told me that when I go to Michigan, he was going to cry. I told him I was going to, too. This made me almost cry. He then told me that he couldn't come with me because he didn't have papers. When I ended up telling older Carlos, Claudia, Tuco, Gabi, and Mona that I was leaving, I told them that I wanted to take all of them with me but couldn't because they didn't have papers. I told them other obvious reasons, too, like school and their parents. Anyway, I told him yes and also reminded him of the other reasons. He then started asking me about if my church sold food, and I told him about the cafe at my church. I was supposed to be in the church at 9:30 like everyday, but Carlos just said to wait until Hermano Jesse called me, so I didn't leave until 10:10. I'm really hoping that I can have another time like that with him again. Like I said before, just chilling and talking with him is my favorite thing to do. I'm going to miss that.

Oct. 19

Around lunch time, I was at older Carlos's house. I think they might have asked me if I had eaten yet, and I told them no because I hadn't. Anyway, Claudia brought me a sandwich and said her mom made it for me. I was surprised, but said muchas gracias because I was hungry and grateful. Older Carlos asked me if I wanted to come over for dinner later, and I said yes because 1) I didn't want to be rude, and 2) because I hadn't eaten dinner with them before, and I thought that would be a cool thing to do with them.
I ate dinner with them, but older Carlos was mad because I wouldn't eat inside his house. Their parents weren't home, and I didn't want to go in their house if I didn't have permission from their parents, and I don't want to be on their bad side. It went well, but once the kids started to get a bit roudy and Gabi spilt quite a bit of food on my shorts, I felt it was time to go. I love those kids, so it was all good. I have to admit, though, that I was a little frustrated because of how they were acting, but I'm over it now.

The girl I like didn't come to the church again. I don't know if this is a sign or not.

Oct. 20

At the end of the kids program today, I told the kids that I was leaving. I thought that was going to be all, but Pastora Berenice asked the kids if they wanted to say anything to me. Miguel, who was the first to say something and which also surprised me, said that he didn't want me to go because he loves me. I legit almost cried. Danely said the same thing, which also surprised me. Carlos said God bless you. That was all who said anything, though, but it really showed me the impact I made on these kids's lives. It showed me that my short time here was definitely worth it. Pastora Berenice had all the kids give me a hug and pray for me. Danely led the prayer. It sounded like a good one, but I could only understand some of it. That really was a great way to start my day.

The girl I like came to the church for drama practice today, so I finally told her that I liked her. I told her that if she didn't feel the same way, then that was ok. We could just be friends.
She told me that she liked me, too.
Giant sigh of relief. On the inside, of course. I ended up telling her before that I was leaving tomorrow, but I would be coming back. She told me, after she had said that she liked me, that her parents had told her that they were moving out of Tijuana. Great. Well, if we are meant to be together, then things will work out. If not, then God has a better plan for both of us.

Carlos was playing tazos with Miguel, and Miguel won, so Miguel took Carlos's tazos because they were playing for keeps. Carlos got really upset an started crying. I found out and asked them what happened. They explained what happened, and apparently, Carlos said he was playing a certain way, but Miguel said the opposite. Also, Carlos had lost thirteen tazos, so I understood why he was upset, but still. After talking about the situation with them, they did something else to settle the matter. Miguel ended up winning again, so it ended up the same. I took Carlos inside and read to him Hebrews 13:5, and the part I read said, "Be content with what you have." This is a verse we taught at Metro Kidz last year, and it's definitely a good one to remember. I told Carlos that just playing tazos is fine, but if you play to just get more and more and more, that's not good. I told him that he needs to be happy with what he has. Getting more is fine, but not that way. He understood, but he was still a little sad. I was going to wait until nighttime, but I decided to give him my Luigi t-shirt that I made when I was his age then. I also gave Miguel my Super Mario Galaxy shirt. I'm giving some of my shirts away because 1) I have so many, 2) I need to get rid of some extra weight in my bags, and 3) I want to give the kids something to remember me by. I'm giving a total of eight shirts away. Hopefully to the right people. I feel so far that I'm doing good with that.

I went to a jóvenes confraternidad tonight with the other jóvenes in the church. I wasn't going to at first because I wanted to spend the whole day with the kids, but after explaining to Carlos that they had asked me to go, including the girl I like (I didn't tell him that I liked her or even mentioned her to him, though), he said that it was good. I was afraid that he was going to be upset, but he wasn't, which made me really happy. I had told him that I was going to do a lot of things with him today, so that's why I had to explain to him first.
At first, the conference was ok. I mean, I didn't understand most of what was mentioned, but the music was good. I believe the youth pastor spoke about dreams, like the ones God gives to us, and about how we need to fight for those dreams. At the end of the conference, he had called people up to get prayer. I believe it was for them to receive a dream or to pray about their dreams, but I'm not sure. I didn't understand why people went forward, so I just stayed at my seat and prayed for them. Near the end, a lady tapped my shoulder and said that the youth pastor wanted to talk to me. I was a little scared at first because I wasn't sure if I would be able to understand him. He asked me a question, but with the loud music and me not knowing a lot of Spanish, I told him that I spoke English. He asked me the question in English. He asked me where I was born, and I said the Unites States. He then asked me why I was here. At first, I didn't understand the question, so I said I didn't know. He then started talking to me more in Spanish because he said his English was bad, but I couldn't really understand him because it was really loud. He then prayed for me, and then he ended the conference. I really wanted to know what he said, so I sought him out afterward. After explaining to him that I couldn't hear him too well and wanted to know what he said, he told me what he said:
"In the United States, you had a lot of things, but here, you have nothing. A lot of people would think you were crazy for doing that, but you did it anyway. A lot of people don't come here because of fear of getting killed after crossing the border, but you came across. You're a missionary, right?"
"Y...Yes."
"Kids look for you because you have the love of God. I know when someone has the love of God because I have the love of God, and you have it. Kids need God's love, the love of a father, and you have it. God has great things for you."
He said other things, too, but I feel that those things are just for me. It was so crazy, though. I've never met him before in my life, but he knew that I was a missionary. Not only that, but he also mentioned about kids. That's what I do. I'm a missionary for kids. I knew that when he said those things, that what he said was from God. Insane. God is so amazing. I really hope I get to see Pastor Abi (that's his name. I find it so weird that he has the same name as my mentor, Abi, from the Dream Center) again. He's anointed, and I definitely want to surround myself with those kinds of people. He seems cool, too.

Oct. 21

My last day in Mexico. For now.
Since it was my last day, a lot of stuff happened:

I had asked the girl I like what her favorite colors were the night before so that I could make her a bracelet. I also wanted to make Carlos a new bracelet since his broke, so, during Sunday School, I made those. I also made one for me since mine broke, which happened to be the same colors as the one I made for Carlos. It took me the whole time to make all three of them. Afterward, I gave Carlos his bracelet. I showed him that I had the exact same one. He reminded me that it was Dia del Amigo and told me something about me being his best friend. Then, it was time for service. At first, the girl I like didn't show up. Not only did I want her to be there, but she was in the drama, too. About halfway through worship, she showed up. Usually, the drama is after offering, but it got moved to the end for some reason. Unfortunately, I couldn't remember all of the moves for the drama. We only practiced two different days. Still, though, I feel it went well. I got it on video, so I'll post it on Facebook once I get the chance. After the drama, Pastor Elvis called me up and told the church that I was leaving, but returning soon. He prayed for me and had everyone give me a hug goodbye. Some people said things to me, too. Good things, of course. I feel bad because Betty, one of the jóvenes, said a lot to me, which surprised me because I don't talk to her, but I could only understand a little of what she said. Hermana Gabi gave me her number and told me to make sure to call her to let her know how everything is going. She also called me her son. She had been calling me that for the past week. I have two Mexican moms now, haha. Others said things to me, too. After that, church was over, so everyone went downstairs to eat. I took some pictures with some of the people, which I will also put on Facebook. As I was packing up my guitar, the girl I like came back upstairs. I gave her the bracelet I made her. She was surprised that I made it. She asked me like three times if I made it. She then gave me one of her bracelets, which I'm wearing now. She said it was to remember her by. She then asked me if I wanted to go downstairs to eat, to which I agreed. I wasn't sure what time my friend from San Diego was picking me up, so I wanted to give some things to Tuco, older Carlos, Gabi, and Claudia before I ate. My friend had called me a few days before and told me that he was picking me up on Sunday sometime in the afternoon, but that was it. It was already past 2, so I wanted to make sure I gave the things to Tuco and his siblings before I had to leave. I went to their house and told them that I wanted to give them some things before I left. Their dad was outside, and he said hi to me. He also watched me give the things to his kids. I gave older Carlos my Flash shirt. He had said to me before that he liked how my shirt had a lightning bolt on it, so I thought I would give it to him. I gave Gabi a heart pin that I got from the conference the night before. One day, I was eating a heart-shaped sucker and was with Gabi and Tuco, and I forget why, but I said, "Yo tengo un corazón, y mi corazón es feliz, ¿así?" Then I made this extremely happy face, to which they both laughed and asked me to do it again. Tuco said I looked like a payaso (clown). After that, Gabi would always ask me to do that, but I said I needed a heart to do it. I now had one, to which I gave to her. I should have did it one more time, but I only said the words, to which she giggled. I attempted to give Claudia one of my t-shirts, but she walked away. Her dad made her come back and take it, so she did. Not sure if she was sad or really didn't want to say goodbye because she didn't want to. Hmmm. I gave Tuco my Jesus fish necklace. He had attempted a few days before to take it off me, which means either he wants to wear it or keep it. He did the same thing the next day, so I decided that I would give it to him the day I left. Carlos wanted my other necklace since I gave one to Tuco, but I told him that I already gave him a bracelet just like mine. I wanted to do something with my necklace since the cross is missing now, but now that I've thought about it, I should've just given it to him. I need to show the kids that I don't care about material things, and I need to be selfless, but I also want them to learn not to want everything and to be content with what they have. Well, I'm bringing back a bunch of Jesus fish necklaces to give to the kids, so he'll get a necklace then. I took some photos with them and then went to the church to eat. I was hoping to sit with the girl I like and Carlos, but the girl I like was helping serve the food. After she was done, I looked for her, but Mariana, one of the teens, told me that she left already. Luis said the same thing. I wanted to get a picture with her before I left, so I went with Luis to her house to talk to her. Luis said that she went to a different church at 4, and it was already 3:50. Thankfully, she was still at her house. When I asked her to take a photo with me, she said she didn't want to because she didn't like taking photos. Great. Her brother came over and listened to us talk. Apparently, he's celoso (jealous. We say over-protective, which is what I think they mean) of his sisters like his dad is, and I can tell because almost every time I try to talk to her, he comes out of no where and listens in or sits between us or something of the sort. Kind of annoying. I hope he stops doing that when I come back so that I won't think of him as annoying. That would be bad since he's the brother of the girl I like. Anyway, I asked for her Facebook, so her brother takes my notebook and writes down some email. I thought it might not be hers (which it isn't), but I knew she had to go because she was cooking before, and I knew her brother wouldn't leave so that I could ask her, so I just told them goodbye and left. I wanted to get a picture with Miguel and Moroni, so I went to their house to do so. I then asked them if they wanted to play before I left, but Miguel had to do something first, so I went to the church to wait for him. While I waited, I took some pictures with some more people and with the kids. Tuco came by, so I grabbed him really quick and took a picture with him and Carlos for my phone. That was my goal for the day. 500 achievement points. I then asked Tuco if he wanted to play with us, and he said yes. I played trais (tag) with Carlos, Moroni, Tuco, and Miguel, except with a ball. Miguel only played for a bit, then he went home to do something. I took some photos with Carlos, Tuco, and Moroni, and then we played some more. After we played for a while, my friend showed up. We continued to play because he went to talk to Pastor Elvis, but, after a bit, I knew that I needed to start saying goodbye. Once my friend finished talking to Pastor Elvis, I started putting my bags in his car. Older Carlos came by, and he, Tuco, Moroni, and Carlos helped me put my bags in the car. I told them that it was fine, but they wanted to help, so I let them. Older Carlos asked me about my cereal, which I still had, so I gave him one box and Carlos the other. There was only a bit left in both, but still. Then, it was time for me to go. I started to say bye to the kids, and Hermano Carlos came out of his house. I went up to say bye to him and Hermana Mary, his wife, and to the rest of his family. Carlos was there, and he started to cry. I had to say bye to him again. I picked him up and held him as he cried. I wanted to cry with him, but nothing came out. I told him, "I'm going to miss you so much. I'm going to return. You're my best friend, right?" He nodded. "Promise that you are going to be nice to your sisters and to your mom and dad, and that you are going to be like God, like Jesus." He nodded and said yes. I put him down, said bye once again, and went to the car. The kids decided to give me a hug all at once. I told them that I needed to go, so they let me go. They watched me as I got in the car. As we pulled out, Carlos ran down from his house to see me leave. Right as we took off, I heard Tuco say, "Bye, Daniel!" They watched as we drove away.

The impact I made on their lives in the last two months will never leave my mind. The cool thing about it is it's only the beginning. I'm going to be back very soon in Jesus' name!

Memorable Moments (pt. 6)

If you haven't yet, check out Memorable Moments (pt.1).

Oct. 10

I went to Walmart with Carlos and older Carlos today. We left at 10 even though I talked with Hermano Carlos the day before and agreed to going at 8. I was originally supposed to be going with Hermano Carlos, but he said that Carlos could go with me. Aight. Then, older Carlos asked me if I went to Walmart yesterday, I told him that no and that I was going today, and he said he wanted to go, too. I thought it would be cool if they both came along, so we all went. I made sure to go quick because they had school, even though it was three hours before they had to go to school. On the way back, older Carlos complained the whole way that he wanted water and was tired. Carlos was fine, but older Carlos complained like he was getting paid 50 pesos every time he did. At first, I tried to get him to stop, but after five minutes of constant complaining, I decided to ignore him. Halfway there, older Carlos decided to take a different route than Carlos and me. I noticed that the roads met near the top of the hill, so I ignored him once again. Once we got to the first meeting point, I didn't see older Carlos anywhere. Went to the next road: no one. Went back to the first road, walked to where he should have been walking: no one. I was so fed up. Not only did Carlos have to get home so that he could shower and eat lunch, but older Carlos was no where to be found, and he had my cereal. I knew he knew his way around, but I didn't want to go back to the church without him. Not just because he had my cereal, but I was somewhat supposed to be watching him. I found out that he never asked his mom, so, really, he followed me to Walmart. Still, I didn't want to go back to the church, find out that he never showed up, his parents yell at me, then I would have to leave. Not happening. As all of this went through my head, older Carlos is sitting at the top of the road I was on laughing. I was so frustrated, mad, upset, all of the above. I told him countless times that there was no time to play around and that we needed to get back pronto so that they could get ready for school. Once I reached him, I blew up. Since he did that, so much time was wasted. I explained to him that that wasn't funny and that next time, he was not coming with me. There were so many things I wanted to say to him, but, due to my lack of Spanish, I could not. Nothing bad, but like how I didn't want him going off and getting hurt or someone hurting him. I tried explaining that to him as we approached the church, and he said that he was Mexican. In other words, he said he was fine due to the fact that he was Mexican. I told him, "I don't care. You're 12. You're only a kid." He argued that, too. After a bit, he said he was sorry, but I told him that he was really going to have to mean it. He said he did, so I forgave him. I was going to forgive him anyway, but still. I want these kids to learn that when they say something like they're sorry, they need to mean it. I told him later on, after I learned how to say it, that I cared for him and didn't want him getting hurt. He then asked if he could have some of my juice, but I told him no. I was nit about to reward him after what he did. Another thing they need to learn: when you do something wrong, you pay the consequences. He didn't like that, but whatever. God, I pray that he actually learns this concept. In Jesus' name, amen.

Tuco was being really adorable today. In the morning, he asked me to go with him to get a free papaya. I said yes, and he held my hand the whole way. Unfortunately, there weren't anymore. The guy asked me if he was my son. I said no, just a friend. I should've told him that he was pretty much like a son to me. Then, he was mad at me because I didn't take him with me when I went to Walmart. That wasn't adorable, but it's somewhat necessary for the next part. I tried explaining to him that I couldn't (and didn't want to) take a bunch of people with me and that two was enough, but, being a little kid, he was still mad at me. Gabi also wanted to go, but didn't, so she was mad, too. Then, either she or Tuco said something about giving Tuco a sandwich, but I told them that I can't give all of my food away and have to save it. If not, then I have to go back to the U.S. I then asked them if they wanted me to stay or leave. Tuco didn't say anything. Gabi said leave. I don't know if it was because she was mad at me or not, but I said, "OK, adios," and went to the church. After a bit, I heard Tuco and Gabi calling my name. I went outside to where they were and just kept a straight face with them. Gabi asked me if I was leaving, and I told her, "Bueno, tú quieres me salir." Then Tuco said, "Yo quiero tu estar aquí," or something along those lines. Adorable. After a bit, Gabi said that she wanted me to stay, too. Then, they ate lunch. Tuco asked me to wait where I was for him and that he was going to get his food. He came back with his food and asked me if I ate already. I didn't, and so he asked me if I wanted some. I agreed, and Gabi came over and gave me a quesadilla. After that, I was sitting in front of the church, and Tuco came over with these sunglasses that had one of the lenses popped out. He put them on and put his eyes right up to mine. I have no idea what he was doing, but I thought it was adorable. Then, I asked him if he wanted to take a picture, and he said yes, so we took two. Later on, Tuco asked me to give him a sandwich, which made me upset because I had already explained to him why I couldn't. I explained to him again why I couldn't, but then said that I might be able to give him
one later. He then asked me to play cars with him. This was the first time he had asked me to play something like that. Of course, I agreed. David ended up coming to where we were, and we started playing a game with the cars. Tuco asked me again for a sandwich, but this time he came over to me, sat on my lap, and gave me a hug. It was so adorable, I couldn't say no. I told him when we were done playing that I would give him one. It's only a folded piece of bread with peanut butter. I didn't mind too much after that. He's so adorable. I want to adopt him.

Somehow, my D string on my guitar is broken. I don't know how since I didn't even play it yesterday, and it was fine the day before. I used the other guitar for worship practice, and the e string broke on that one. Great. I ended up playing bass. It was so awesome. I felt like a boss. It was really easy to learn, like it took me two minutes. Emmanuel told me that they would get me new strings for Sunday. Sweet.

Oct. 11

Carlos hasn't really talked to me ever since we got back from Walmart. I tried talking with him, but he said he had to take a shower, eat lunch, then go to school. It was two hours before he had to go to school. Hmmm.
I found out later that he had a lot of homework to do, so I understood. Still, he didn't even tell me that. I don't know. Hopefully nothing is up.

Pastor Elvis came to the church around 11:30 today, so I thought it would be a good opportunity for him to talk to one of the pastors from my church in Michigan. Pastor Elvis had asked me if I heard anything from my pastor, and I told him no since my phone hadn't been working right. I said that since it was working now, maybe I could call my church and have him talk to the Spanish-speaking pastor. He agreed. After they talked, they both said that it would be best for me to go back to Michigan for now and raise more support and hopefully get support from my church. Afterward, I could come back here and be financially stable and whatnot. I have mixed feelings about this. I really, really, REALLY don't want to leave, but, if it's God's will, then I will. I'm still wondering why God allowed me to be here if I was just going to go back two months later, but His plan is bigger and better than mine. Maybe there was something He wanted me to see. I don't know. I'll find out soon enough.

I went and played with Tuco and Gabi, and I ended up telling them that I might be leaving. I'm not really sure if Gabi cares, but I could really tell that Tuco was sad. He might have said, "Yo quiero tu quedarse aquí," but I'm not sure. It's hard to understand him sometimes. It's hard to understand his whole family sometimes. He then asked me to play action figures with him. They were like mini-action figures. Anyway, of course I agreed. How could I not? He pretended that his guy was living in this house that he made out of this dirt hill, and I was his friend or something. Then, this bionicle guy attacked us. Then, Tuco's guy moved to a different house at the top of the hill. It was this toy barn silo, but still. Like I said, Tuco is adorable. I'm making the adoption papers right now.
Seriously, I don't want to leave. I don't want to leave the kids. I'm finally starting to get them to not hit me as much and to not ask for my food all of the time. They have food, so it's not like they're starving. If they were, then I would definitely give them food without a doubt in my mind. I want them to know that I'm here to be there for them and to show them God's amazing love, not to give them a sandwich or a cookie. Now that I think they're starting to get that, I might be leaving. God, do Your will. Help it not to hurt so much.

Carlos's family knows now about what happened today. I told the parents and was going to tell them not to tell Carlos, but they did anyway. Hopefully he isn't too sad. It's only a maybe right now. My church is supposed to call me tomorrow and tell me what's up, so I'll find out then. Again, God, let Your will be done. In Jesus' name, amen.

Oct. 12

It poured last night. Lodo: Round 3.

I called my church today. Same news as yesterday. Don't know when, but I'm supposed to get a call back soon.

I hung out with Miguel and Moroni a lot today. More than usual. Carlos was with us, too. They didn't have school today because of the rain. I wish that was the same for my school when I was a kid, haha. We started playing outside, but once I got five pounds of mud on my shoes, I decided that maybe it was better to play inside. Pastor Elvis and his family were here, so it was all good in the hood. Carlos was wearing a shirt today that said that, haha. It was different playing with Miguel and Moroni. No getting hit. No angry kids. No throwing fits. Me gusta.

I hung out with Luis for the second half of the day. I told him about me possibly leaving. He said that I should just get a job here. I tried explaining to him that it can't just be any old job. It would have to line up with my calling. I wouldn't feel right otherwise. I'm not sure if I explained it correctly, but I did His best (His = God's. No more doing things in my own power). I then went with him to Paola's house, and we chilled there for a bit. Then, we went to his house and ate quesadillas. I was supposed to teach English at 7, but no one showed up, so Luis and I went to Carlito's house. I played FIFA12 against Brandon, Carlito's brother, and won. I beat a Mexican at soccer. I was scared. Of course, it was a video game, and I pretty much was just pressing buttons, but still. At 9, Carlito and Luis went to this different church to pray, but first, Luis went with me back to the church. After getting my phone from his house, we went our separate ways. Literally. Good day.

Oct. 13

Three new kids showed up to the Saturday program thing today: Ismael, Delek, and another Miguel. That made me really happy because we haven't had new kids in like the past month. They're all little kids, too, like 5 years old. Double bonus.

I'm a part of the drama team now, starting today. I'm doing this pantomiming thing next Sunday, and the Sunday after that, I'm playing Jesus in another thing. In the other thing, I'm dancing with the girl I like. The thing is, though, that I didn't know that I would be dancing with her. I knew she was the main part, but I didn't think I would have to dance with her. Great. God, help me.

I went to the orphanage with Luis today. Unfortunately, we got there at like 5, but still. I saw Cristofer again and was able to play with him this time. I also saw Christian, Ulysses, and Martin, but none of them said much to me. I met a bunch of new kids, too: Dilcia, Samantha, Amarani, Edwin, Alex, Angel, and Moises. I think I knew Samantha already, but I couldn't remember her name at all. I felt really bad because she knew mine, but I didn't know hers. Oops. Also, today was Amarani's Quincallera, which is her 15th birthday, but it's also the day she matures into a woman, or so it is in Mexican culture. This birthday is a big deal for Mexicans. If I would have known, I would have dressed up or something, but no one told me. Oh well. We had dinner and cake afterward, which was delicious. By the time that ended, it was already dark, so I got a couple pictures with Cristofer that all turned out blurry unfortunately, and a video with Cristofer, Dilcia, and Moises. Hopefully, I'll be able to put it up on Facebook soon. Tyler, one of the directors of the orphanage, gave me $5 to use for the taxi even though I told him that I had enough. It's a good thing he did, though, because we ended up getting on the wrong taxi at one point, so I had to use extra money for that. If I didn't have that $5, I wouldn't have made it home. Thank you, God. Overall: amazing day.

Oct. 14

Tuco got his adorable hair cut. His hair looks like mine when I got mine cut, haha. Well, at least he won't have hair covering his eye anymore.

After church, Luis told me that next Sunday, Pastor Elvis Is making a worship CD with our worship band. Oh man. I'm going to be on a CD.

I'm not sure if I mentioned it before, but there's been these carnival rides down the hill from the church. Ever since they showed up, I've wanted to go on them. Today was the day. I went to the church soccer game with Carlos, and when he got back, he told me that his family was at the carnival. I didn't believe him because he had been making a lot of stuff up today. I also was watching him, so I didn't want to go down to the feria with Carlos when no one told me about it. When Karla and Estefani were walking up the hill to get him, I believed him. We went there, and I went on this little dragon roller coaster. I was definitely too big for it, but he wanted me to go on it with him, so I made myself fit. The thing went around at least 20 times, no joke. I seriously started wondering if the guy was going to ever stop it. Afterward, I went on this one ride with Mary Cruz, who met us there. She goes to our church, and I've talked to her every now and then. The ride went up and down and in a circle all at once. It lifted you out of your seat, which I thought was pretty fun. Mary Cruz didn't think so. Every time the ride went from high to low, she would scream. She ended up linking arms with me. She was pretty scared to begin with. I couldn't help but laugh. Not in a mean way at all, but the fact that I had a screaming girl linked arm-to-arm with me. I kept telling her, "Esta bien, esta bien," but I don't think she believed me. Her big hoop earring flew off while we were on the ride, too. Luckily, we were able to find it afterward. Overall, it was so fun. If I get the chance to go back again, I so am. Oh, also, there's this one ride there that freaks me out: the pirate ship ride. I don't know what it is, but something about going back and forth really high like that makes me feel like I'm going to fall out. There's not that much protecting you, either. The guy running it stopped it while it was as high as it could be in the air. I legit freaked out just by looking at it. A few nights ago, I had two nightmares about that dumb ride. In the first one, I was on it with Carlos, and he fell out. I had to grab on to his arm and try to pull him back in which it was moving. Terrifying. In the second one, I was on it, and it collapsed. I think I survived, but still. Rides like that are the only ones I don't like going on. Every other one: legooooo.

Oct. 15

I went to Hermana Gabi's house again to use the Internet. When I got there, one of her sons, Diego, was listening to Dubstep. That made me happy. While I was there, Hermana Gabi gave me breakfast, lunch, and a little snack, too. She blessed me so much. I also talked to her about everything that has been going on, like with my church and possibly going back to Michigan. She said that sometimes, we have to do things we don't want to do or don't like to do, but we need to do them. I knew that, but I definitely needed to be reminded of it. She said that it's also better to talk to my pastor in person rather than over the phone, which is definitely true. When I left, she gave me two donuts to eat. Thank ya, Jesus.

Oct. 16

My church called me this morning. I'm going back to Michigan next Tuesday. Not to stay (as far as I know), but so that I can talk with the pastors from my church and really get a solid support system. I prayed that if God wanted me to go back to Michigan, then everything would work out for everyone involved. As of now, everything is working out great. Unfortunately. Lol. I'm leaving Mexico Sunday evening.

I told Hermano Jesse and Hermano Carlos that I was leaving. I made sure to tell them not to tell anyone just yet. I'm trying to be cautious with who I tell this to. I feel that it might be better that way. I definitely want to wait to tell the kids.

Hands down, Tuco is officially the most adorable kid ever. HE came over to me and motioned for me to pick him up three different times today. When a kid does that, I find it extremely adorable. He wins the turkey.

I told Luis that I was leaving. He said that I need to be here when he gets married. He actually proposed to his fiancee, Susana, two weeks ago. I believe he said that they were planning to get married in February, so I gotta make sure I get the ball rollin' to get back here in time for that.

I ended up telling Carlos that I was leaving. I wasn't going to because I didn't want him to be sad, but I had to. He asked me to play my iPod because I had gotten new games on it and showed them to him yesterday, but I told him no because I wanted to spend time with him, but I couldn't if he was playing my iPod. At first, I told him that I might not have much time here because I might have to go back to Michigan, but I stopped myself and told him that not maybe, but that I was leaving to Michigan. I couldn't lie to him. I can't lie. I could tell that he was about to cry, but he did his best to hold it in. I told him that since I didn't have that much time here, I wanted to do as many things with him as possible, but, if he played my iPod, then I couldn't do things with him because he'd be playing my iPod alone, and I don't have any multiplayer games. He then told me that he only wanted to play it one more time. I told him that after dinner he could play with it. I then told him that I needed to talk to Pastor Elvis about me leaving, so I told him to wait. I also told him to make sure that he didn't tell anyone for multiple reasons. He gave me a hug, and I went to talk to Pastor Elvis. When I got up to walk, Carlos gave me another hug. Overtaken by adorableness, I picked him up and held him for a while. I didn't want to let him go, but I had to so that I could talk to Pastor Elvis.

After telling Pastor Elvis everything about me leaving, he said that they all were going to be sad, but it's good that I am so that I can get the support I need. He also said that he was going to help me put a video together and gather my pictures together onto a disk so that I could show them to my church and everyone else. Amen.

While I was outside in front of Carlos's house with Carlos playing with my iPod and sitting with some of his family and Luis, I saw one guy running pretty fast up the garbage area. A couple seconds later, another guy did the same. I didn't think anything of it, but then Hermano Carlos told us to go in his house as he was walking down the hill to see what was up. I heard what sounded like shooting, but I thought it was too quiet for shooting, so, again, I thought nothing of it. After that, Hermano Carlos and Luis told me that the one guy was chasing after the other with a gun, and that what I heard was shots going off, but with a silencer. I then thought back to before that, and I realized that I was going to sit in front of the church with Carlos, but he decided that he wanted to sit by his house. If I would've sat with Carlos by the church, right where those guys ran by, something could have happened. I started thanking God for changing Carlos's mind and keeping us by Carlos's house out of harm's way. Again, God, thank You.

I've thought about it, and I feel that it's better to tell everyone that I'm leaving before the day I leave. I was going to wait until Sunday to tell everyone, but I think it's better to do it before. I might wait to tell the kids, though, until Saturday. I don't want them to be sad longer than they're going to be. I told Carlos, but that's because I couldn't lie to him. I can't lie to anyone, nor do I want to, so I'm not going to mention anything about it unless asked.

Memorable Moments (pt. 5)

If you haven't yet, check out Memorable Moments (pt. 1).

Oct. 3

I met those Americans today. Carlos wanted to meet them, but at first, his dad said no because they were working, so I didn't go at that time, either. I then remembered that older Carlos tried talking to me earlier, but I was spending time with Jesus at that time, so I couldn't. I went to find him to see what he wanted, and he was with the Americans. I went to where he was, and Tuco, Gabi, Kevin, other Jesús, and some of the other kids were there, too. I met Diane and the other two guys that she was with, and they're from Oregon. Apparently, they're here until the second week of November. They got here on Sunday. They're building a bigger church for Kevin's dad. Kevin's dad is a pastor of a church nearby, but it's pretty small, so they're building him a bigger one. Also, in a week and a half, six more people are coming here, three are leaving, then, in November, six more are coming. None of them speak Spanish. This doesn't surprise me. They're pretty ok people. Apparently, they were here in March, and they already knew Tuco and Kevin. Possibly more, but I'm not sure. Anyway, I talked with them for a bit since they weren't really doing anything, then I got Carlos so he could meet them. He talked to Diane in English, but only for a bit. He was being really shy. Of course, he only knows a few phrases in English, but still. I told Carlos's dad that we'd only talk with them for a bit, so after a few minutes, we left. I'll probably see them again soon. They better not take my kids away from me. Lol, jk. But seriously.

Hermano Carlos has been building a house (I think) for the past several days, so he's been having one of the kids stay home from school to watch Kevin, Carlos's one year-old brother. It's where Carlos's family used to hang up their clothes, which is right next door. I'll refer to Carlos's little brother as little Kevin. Anyway, I guess it was Carlos's turn to watch him, which I don't know why since Carlos is only seven and can't do certain things that little Kevin needs, but Hermano Carlos asked me if I could help watch little Kevin, which I agreed to. I wasn't doing anything today anyway. It was a little more harder than I thought. At first, little Kevin was sleeping, so it was fine, but then something happened, and I started tickling Carlos. To get me to stop, instead of saying stop, he yelled little Kevin's name, which after a bit woke little Kevin up. That made me a little upset. Then I had to really watch little Kevin like a hawk because he was walking around. Carlos kept on doing things to little Kevin, like picking him up when he really can't and giving him things that aren't good for babies to have, so I had to keep on telling Carlos to stop. Pretty annoying.

While I was watching little Kevin, Carlos wanted me to help him make a kite. Like homemade. I did the best I could with what he had, but it came out pretty bad. It was too small, so it wouldn't fly. I told him that we could build another one tomorrow. That is, if he can get the materials again.

I had another episode with Jesús and Carlos today. Apparently, they're mad at each other again because they both claim that whenever we're going to play a game, the other says, "Nah, otra juego, otra juego," which is a ridiculous reason to be mad at someone. I told both of them separately that this was ridiculous and that this needed to stop. Carlos was going to say sorry to Jesús, but Jesús wouldn't listen. I got really sick of it, so I got the pastor to talk to them. He did and said everything was fine with them, but things really weren't. Right when the pastor left, Carlos said he didn't want to play anymore and was going home. He was crying. Jesús didn't really say anything. Then Karla came by and started asking Carlos why he was crying. I told her that this wasn't for her, but she kept on antagonizing him. I told her to stop causing trouble and that I needed to talk with him, but then Caesar came by and said that she wasn't causing trouble and that Hermano Carlos didn't know where Carlos was and was looking for him. Karla didn't say anything about that, and Caesar and Hermano Carlos both saw me walk with Carlos into the church. I didn't think of that at the time, so Carlos went home, Jesús left, and I looked like an idiot. I was so fed up with the whole thing. Here I was, trying to solve an issue that had been going on for a while, almost succeeded on my own, but then asked for help. I really don't know if what Pastor Elvis said to them really made anything better, but I know that Karla and Caesar didn't make things better. I felt that everything I tried to do was pointless and didn't solve anything. I felt that maybe if I knew more Spanish that I would be able to help more. I felt useless. I went behind the church and prayed. Most of the time, I just sat there and listened for God's voice. After a while of just talking at God about how mad I was at the situation and listening for His voice, I broke down. I started crying and asked God to just say something to me. I told Him that I felt alone and really needed someone to talk to that would understand me. He then reminded me that just because He wasn't physically there didn't mean that He wasn't there. He also reminded me how much I had been there for the kids and how hard I've been trying to help them. I asked Him to help me feel like I was doing something, like being here was worth it. I asked Him to give me peace. I asked Him to help me to stop being mad at Karla and Caesar. He did all of those things. God is so amazing. Please pray this doesn't happen again and that God continues to help me in all things.

Carlos's mom said that she was like my mom and that Hermano Carlos was like my dad. Then Carlos started calling me his brother. Lol.

Oct. 4

This is the third night in a row that I've had a dream about being at the Dallas Metro Dream Center. I really do miss that place a lot, but is this like a sign or something? I would love to go back there, but I don't know. I definitely need to pray about this.

After praying a lot, God told me to just continue doing what I'm doing, and He'll reveal to me in His time what's next. I was so glad to hear from Him.

Mexicans ask awkward questions. In front of all of his kids, Hermano Carlos asked me who's cooking I liked better: his, Hermana Gabi, or Hermana Maida. I really like all of the cooking, but I've only had Hermana Gabi and Hermana Maida's cooking once. I told him all of the cooking, which is true, but Hermana Gabi made porkchops, salad, and really good pasta. Again, I only had her cooking once, but it was really good. I've been eating with Hermano Carlos every day for the past month, and there's only been like two things I haven't liked. What am I supposed to say to the person who provides me with meals everyday? Awkward question.

Older Carlos got in a fight with some other kid today. It really happened out of nowhere. I was playing karate with the other kids, and Tuco and David had these really long sticks. Some other kids were walking home from school, and Tuco was waving his stick at the kids and almost hit one of them. I went over to where Tuco was and took his stick from him and told him that it was only for playing and not for real. He then walked to the side of the road where Leo and Gabi and the other kids were. I walked with him, and as soon as I turned around, older Carlos and this other kid were legit fighting, like full-out fist fighting. At first, I wasn't sure if I should've broken it up or stayed out of it, so I just stood to the side, but once I saw the other kid punch older Carlos in the head hard - and I mean hard - I decided it was time for me to do something. I walked over to them and broke it up. It was a little harder than I thought it was going to be, but I separated them. Luckily, I know a decent amount of Spanish to tell them that that was enough. I asked older Carlos why he was hitting that kid, but he didn't answer. He just stood looking angrily at the other kid. The other kid was doing the same. I then told the other kid that that was enough and that he needed to leave, so he did along with his friends that were watching. Then, older Carlos walked over to where Tuco, Gabi, and the other kids were and then went to his house. Kevin and Claudia were mad at me for stopping the fight, but I didn't care. None of my kids are fighting anybody while I'm around. Also, it's not good for anyone to fight. Except for war, but you know what I mean. I wanted to find out why older Carlos was fighting with that kid, but I decided to wait a bit for him to cool down. I found him a few minutes later and talked with him. First, I asked him why he was fighting that kid. He said it was because the kid stabbed him with a pen in school, and he showed me the mark. I then started to tell him that fighting was bad, but he interrupted me and said, "Ya, ya. Peleando malo. Yo malo." I told him that yes, fighting is bad, but he isn't bad. I did my best to explain to him that sometimes, when someone gets mad, they do things that aren't good. I tried to tell him that it happens, but I didn't know the word for happens, so I switched it up. I told him that the reason why I stopped the fight was because I was trying to protect him. I told him that maybe the kid could've punched him in the head really hard, and he could've fell to the ground, his head bleeding a lot, and he could've went to the hospital. Then I said, "Carlos, te amo, y yo no quiero ver tu recibiendo duele." I then told him that if that kid wanted to fight him again, that he could just tell me, and, even though I don't know much Spanish, I could talk to the kid. At that, he laughed. Not 100% sure why, but I think it was because of the way I demonstrated it. I sometimes act what I'm saying. Anyway, I told him that I was here for him, and he gave me a hug and called me his papa again, haha.
I then realized why I am here: to help these kids. Yeah, it's kind of obvious, but I mean with life situations, like what happened today. If I wasn't there to break up that fight, it could've went on until one of them was on the ground. I'm here not only to play with the kids, but to teach them right from wrong and to show them how to live Godly lives. No one else is showing older Carlos, so I got to. God, fill me with Your love, wisdom, peace, joy, and everything else about You, and help me to continue helping these kids. I can't do it without You.

Oct. 5

Older Carlos fought that kid in school and got in trouble. I think the paper said that he has in-school suspension on Monday. Great. Well, I did Your best, God. Continue to work at his heart, God.

I went to a young adult conference. I thought that maybe I could understand some of it, but I didn't. Well, I understood some, but not a lot. The speaker read from Daniel 3 which is the story of Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego. I think he talked about how God is faithful through everything. True that.

Oct. 6

I was supposed to go to the orphanage today with Luis, but after his drama class was over, it was already 3. It takes an hour to get there, and it gets dark at 7, so I'd maybe have three hours there. Maybe. And the conference is continuing today, but now it's for everyone. I know Luis wants to go to it. He said it was no problem for him, but still. Hopefully, things go quicker next week, and maybe I'll have more time at the orphanage.

Matthew 6 is an amazing chapter of the Bible. So much good stuff. Check it out. You'd be glad that you did.

While I was playing with Carlos, older Carlos, and Estefani, I saw this one lady with her little girls carrying these huge bags of clothes. The bags of clothes happened to be the ones that were donated to the church several days ago. I could tell that they were struggling, so I decided to ask them if they wanted help, to which the mom said yes. Carlos and the other kids said that I wasn't allowed to help her and that they were going to tell Hermano Jesse if I did. Carlos then said that I needed to ask Hermano Jesse, but I told Carlos to ask for me, and I left. The lady's house wasn't too far, but it was almost at the top of the hill, and I was at the bottom. I've figured out that Baja California is one giant cluster of hills. You're either going up hill or down hill. Anyway, I helped them carry the bags to their house, and the mom thanked me for helping her.
This brought to my attention another reason why I'm here: to help and serve whenever and wherever I can. I'm here to bring Jesus to these people. Jesus lived a servant's life. He did tons of things that weren't fit for who He actually was. He served when people should've been serving Him. He should've been living as a king, but He chose to serve, and that's the greatest example of servanthood. I want my life to be a living example of what Jesus did: serving whenever and whoever needed it. These people need Jesus, and serving is one way to do it. After all, actions speak louder than words.

It seems as if all the young adults have a boyfriend/girlfriend. Except for me. Well, not all of them, but about 90% of them, and that's a lot since they're aren't many of us. It's kind of awkward for me, but only when they're all together with their significant other. For example, yesterday, we went to the second part of the conference, and all the couples were sitting with each other doing couple things. I was sitting next to one of the couples, and my leg was next to the other guy's leg. In Mexico, it really doesn't matter how many people are in one car, so there was about 12 of us crammed in a 7-seater van like a bad game of Tetris. Well, at least in the area where I was sitting. In other words, I was sitting in a way that my leg was right next to both of the people. The girl reached over to pinch the guy's leg in a flirtatious manner, but she wasn't looking. You probably know the rest. Awkward. So, as you can see, it's a little awkward for me. Luis also jokes around about this one girl liking me. Ever since last weekend, he's been doing this every time she's around. The thing is, though, I kind of like her, so part of me hopes that he's not joking. She enjoys working with kids, is awesome to be around, and she's beautiful. I only say beautiful when I absolutely mean it, too. I need to find out her heart and see what path she feels God is telling her to go with her life, and hopefully it's on the same path as mine. Pray for me?

Oct. 7

So I ended up telling Luis that I liked that girl. I hope things don't turn out bad.

At the end of church, Pastor Elvis had the people come up if they had any problems that they needed to give to God. I'm about 95% sure that's what it was. I was praying in the Spirit over the people who were up there since I wasn't sure exactly why everyone was up there. While doing this, I asked God to show me what they were going through so that I knew exactly what to pray for. I felt Him tell me that someone was struggling with breathing and that I needed to pray for them. I felt like I should go up and announce it on the mic, but I couldn't find a good opportunity, plus I was nervous, so I asked God that if it was truly Him to show me who it was and that I would pray for that person privately, like not in front of the church, but only with them. After church, I went to Mary Cruz's house for lunch, and Hermana Maida came a little after I did. Once she made it, she was breathing pretty heavy and said that she couldn't sit down until she caught her breath. Once I saw this, I realized that it was her that God had asked me to pray for. After she and her daughter finished eating, they got up to leave. As they approached the door, I knew that I needed to pray for her, so I asked God to give me the words to say, and I stopped her before she left. I asked her if she had trouble with breathing, and she said that when she walks, a little, but when she works, it's really hard for her. She said that the doctor told her that her right lung was only working at 30% capacity, but that it was normal or something, and that she has something in her body to help her lung. She said her other lung worked fine. When she told me this, I thought to myself, "This isn't normal. What is she talking about? This isn't from God at all." I then asked her if I could pray for her, and she agreed, so I did. Afterward, she said thank you, but I don't really know if she was better. She left right afterward, so I didn't get the chance to see if she was really better. I'm believing and praying that she is. I'm just praying that she is doing the same. God, continue to be with her, and supernaturally touch her body with Your divine healing power. In Jesus' name, amen.

My mom called me today, and I was able to tell her what was going on with my phone. Hopefully things can get fixed. I haven't been able to call anyone for the past week. Actually, things aren't that bad without my phone. I'm able to focus solely what's going on here, plus I'm not using my minutes. Maybe it's better that I can't call anyone.

Oct. 8

I watched Kevin again today, but alone this time. At one point, Kevin started crying a lot, and Hermano Carlos said to bring Kevin outside where he was working if Kevin started crying, so I did. Another guy was working with Hermano Carlos, and he kept referring to me as "guerdo", which I'm pretty sure is slang for "white person", so it's pretty much like he's calling me "cracker". It bothers me a little bit, especially since I told him my name. I don't call him "beaner", so why should he call me that? I wouldn't anyway, but still. It was also pretty hard to understand what he was saying half the time, too. He would ask me if I understood what he said, like if I knew what the words he said meant, and I wanted to say, "No, porque tú no decir muy bien," but I thought that would be rude, so I didn't. I found out later from Hermano Carlos that the guy isn't a Christian, drinks a lot, and does drugs. That explains his speaking habits. Hermano Carlos also said he's been trying to get him to church, too, but the guy doesn't want to. Yet. Much prayer is needed for him.

When I brought Kevin to Hermano Carlos, Tuco and Gabi saw me and asked me to go where they were. Unfortunately, since I was watching Kevin, I couldn't. I felt really bad because they haven't actually asked me to come to where they were in a while. Now that they were asking me to, I couldn't. Well, Gabi does, but Tuco hasn't for a while, and Tuco is one of my favorite kids. I think it's mostly because he's five, and I like working with that age group. Plus, he's adorable, so how could I ever say no to playing with him? He's also a good kid, too, when he's not around his siblings. There's a lot of reasons. Anyway, hopefully, that will happen again, and, hopefully, I'll be able to play with them.

I want cereal. BAD. I like cereal. A lot. If you feel led, send me some money so I can buy some. Please.

Oct. 9

The same incident happened with Tuco and Gabi today, only, this time, I was able to play with them. Leo and David were there, too. I'm really glad I was able to play with them. I want to make sure that I still have a relationship with them, but, if I don't do anything with them, then they won't talk to me or anything. Also, I really enjoy playing with them. One of the things Tuco asked me to do was race him. I thought it was adorable and kind of funny since I am so much bigger than him, but I raced him anyway. I made sure that we tied, though. Then, Gabi started racing with us. I felt bad for Tuco since Gabi and I are faster than him, so, in the last race, I picked him up and ran with him. We won, haha. Man, I love those kids. God, continue to change their hearts. I also pray that Tuco isn't led astray by his siblings. He's really a good kid, and I want him to stay that way. I'm sure You do, too. En el nombre de Jesús, amen.

God continues to show up with blessings. As I was walking today, Hermana Leo saw me and asked me to sit with her and her husband and some other guy, I think. She then offered me a whole pomegranate, which I said yes to. At first, I didn't realize that she was going to give me a whole one, but she did, and it was pretty big. Unfortunately, I had to leave like right after she gave it to me because Hermano Carlos wanted me to watch Kevin. Later on, Hermana Leo made me a big Tupperware bowl full of Mexican rice. Muy delicioso. God, thank You so much for providing, and thank You so much for Hermana Leo. She blesses me a lot. Please bless her overabundantly. En el nombre de Jesús, amen.

Long story short: Karla went to hit Carlos because Carlos did something, and she had scissors in her hand. I told her, "Uh, not with those." She then hit my leg as a way of telling me to shut up. I then said, "Um, excuse me?" She did it again. I got up and told her, "Excuse me, but you don't hit me." She pretended to ignore me and talked to Carlos. Fed up, I straight up said, "Ok, whatever. I'm talking with your dad." So I did. She and Estefani have been hitting me and lying to me almost all the time, and I'm sick of it. I dislike hitting, and I have a strong pet-peeve against lying. Homie don't play dat.